I hate crying to sleep, waking up feeling hella shitty, puffy eyes, red and stuffy noses, ruffled tissues, tear stains on my pillowcases, headaches, and heartaches. I'm trying so hard to be cool about what's going on, but deep down it's seriously killing me. There were so many times today I walked around school thinking what everyone says..."everything's gonna be okay, Gayle." But each time I thought about how good my day would be, I wanted to cry because I knew I'd just be lying to myself. Where are your friends when you need them the most? When you need someone's shoulder to cry on, the people who said, "I'm always here for you.", where the fuck were they? Where were they when I said I needed to talk, when I called them and they didn't pick up, when I walked in the halls by myself with tears falling down my face as I frantically looked for someone to run to? They were busy. Busy doing their own thing. Busy forgetting that ONE TIME they told you, "I'm always be here for you." But I guess you can't blame them, because you know damn well people only say that because they feel bad, or don't know what else to say to you at that moment. Today fucking sucked. It's the start of the more miserable days I'm gonna have to face. I just want everything to be good. But you can't always get what you want in life. I'm dehydrated, metaphorically speaking. You would think I could get some of that water from all the tears I've cried. Help me.
Emotionless. Weak. Crushed. Baby, I'm so desperate for your love.
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